You may try to teach your teens the consequences of unprotected sex, but that doesn’t mean that they’re going to listen. Unfortunately, you could find yourself dealing with an unexpected teen pregnancy in your family. How you act and react to the news can make all the difference in the world.
Of course, your hope is that your daughters and sons will remain pure until marriage. When they’re bombarded with teen actresses and singers having babies before marriage it’s no wonder they may think it’s the thing to do. Luckily, as parents, you can have a big impact on their decisions regarding sexual relationships and how to handle an unexpected pregnancy should one occur.
First, understand that if your daughter is pregnant or your son is the father-to-be of an unexpected pregnancy, they’re not the only ones. Having children out of wedlock is not frowned upon now like it used to be in years past, but you may still feel a sense of shame. If at all possible, nip that emotion in the bud. What your child needs more than anything at this time is for you to love and support them.
Make sure that the young lady, whether she’s yours or not, takes care of herself and the unborn child. Take her to the doctor for her initial visit so they can ensure she knows how to take care of herself while she’s pregnant, what to do, and especially what to avoid during this time. Be supportive of her and let her know that you want to be a part of the process rather than judging and belittling her for allowing this unplanned pregnancy to happen.
Get everyone – the pregnant girl, father of the child, and both sets of parents – together to discuss the options. While abortion is one option to consider, it’s not the only one. Perhaps the soon-to-be grandparents would be willing to take the child and raise it as their own. There is also the possibility of putting the baby up for adoption if the teenagers aren’t ready to become parents.
Don’t play the blame game. Even though the pregnancy may not have been planned, the child is on its way. Do all you can to support the teenagers, both emotionally and financially. Give them wise counsel based on your love for them and you may soon realize that you like the idea of becoming a grandparent.
When dealing with an unexpected teen pregnancy it’s natural for emotions to be raw. The teens will be afraid of how their parents will react, and the parents will be hurt and maybe disappointed. Rather than basing every decision on these emotions, try to be supportive and draw together to welcome your new grandchild to the family.